The Constant Gardener

A highly recommended, phenomenal film...

Anyway, it gave me some food for thought on my future, love & relationships, and what is important in my life. Apologies in advance for the somewhat odd testimonial entry...

For the future bit:
In what seems to be a distant memory, I remember choosing to study international affairs so that I could somehow make the world a better, safer place to live in, for all people and not just those who can buy a good life with their power, birth rights or wealth. Deep down, I realize that the reason I came to Cambridge to continue my studies was to follow that path. The one thing I didn't like about working in public relations was that I reaped (what I felt) were only empty rewards-- a front page article that we "sold in" to the right newspaper, bettering companies' reputations so that they could make even more profits than what they deserved, and so on. It is not to say that all companies are bad, or that I disliked my job. Actually, I enjoyed my time there, and it is not everyday that one thinks about the greater good of their daily work. But I am again reminded that I do have a need to feel that I am making a difference in the life of someone who needs it. More and more I am thinking that maybe the UN is the route for me to go. It is not a flawless organization by a long shot, but it has the potential and the means, as well as the intentions, to do more good in the world than I could do by myself.

For the love & relationships bit:
There is only one answer to this, and it's simply S. He kindly reminded me today that if I do indeed choose to go the above route in my future, we will probably be living in New Jersey, because I won't be making enough money for my brownstone in the West Village... Always the pragmatic, he is. :-)

And for the bits of importance:
See above, and include family and friends, and an early New Years resolution to take better care of myself, in abstract terms. Not enough of those bits lately... But soon! T minus 10 days until my sister and brother-in-law arrive for a week-long visit, T minus 17 days until I am on a plane to Tokyo, and then soon after home for Christmas with my mom and my friends. Can't come quickly enough!

The truth?

To start this one off, I give you another good one by Oscar Wilde:

"She behaves as if she was beautiful. Most American women do. It is the
secret of their charm."

The secret of their charm or of their demise, I often wonder.

It seems to me that men and women live in a web of miscommunication. It's not much different from the "whisper down the alley" game we used to play when we were children. The woman says something clearly on one end, and on the other end, the man receives some garbled mess of language that he can't quite make out. (Actually, throw a foreign language into the mix and it gets even more complicated). But let's analyse this a bit more. How clear is the woman REALLY being? What are her intentions? In "whisper down the alley," you say a clear statement, but by nature of playing the game, you know that what you say will probably be received wrongly in the end. So subconsciously, do you, perhaps, choose a more difficult phrase to say-- one that can be misconstrued in all sorts of ways to prompt an interesting response at the other end?

In the game of relationships, do women and men do the same to each other? If we issue a completely clear statement, we are bound to it in many ways... and if we are not completely sure ourselves, maybe we don't necessarily want the other person to receive our communications so clearly after all. So then whose fault is it for the misunderstanding?

Being a woman, it's hard to fault my own kind ;-) But sometimes a bit of self-reflection is worth mentioning. So apologies to all of you, who over the years (you know who you are), have sometimes been on the receiving end of my baffling, blown-up, or completely bastardized statements of "truth."

Anyway, it was Eve who tempted Adam with the apple in the first place, wasn't it?

On Women...

“Women inspire us with the desire to do masterpieces, and always prevent us from carrying them out”

~Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

So I ask you men, is it true??

More of my thoughts on this later.

To be a schoolgirl again...

Last night was a "haunting" evening in many ways. First was our Halloween formal hall dinner at the college, where everyone made their best attempts to dress in "fancy dress," as the English call "costume," and make the best of the champagne and port. Apparently there is a tradition in the formal hall, where if someone drops a penny in your drink, you have to chug the whole glass in one shot. I seemed to be an easy target for this and was "pennied" several times throughout the evening, easily signifying the beginning of the end for me.

True to my costume, I felt like quite the schoolgirl during the rest of the night. By the time we made it to the after party from dinner, it was harder and harder to stand up straight, unless I was dancing, and well, we all know how it goes when EngRish GiRL has been dancing with a few too many drinks. If you need a reminder, just think back to my birthday party this past year, or the full moon party in Thailand, and then please never mention it again!

Luckily I didn't seem to be the only one enjoying the party, and at least I could justify my "immature" behavior with my schoolgirl innocence :-)

Anyway, if I ever missed Phi Psi parties, or ADPi parties for that matter, or the general debauchery of university life, I found it again last night. Hopefully, I can now put it back into history where it belongs.

Laverne & Shirley

The latest news from the pipeline in Pennsylvania is: my mom got two new puppies!

I suppose if I don't have any nieces or nephews for the time being, I might as well get... more dogs in my family (slight brow furrowing). More precisely, however, these are not just any dogs, but victims of what seems to be the latest in doggy genetics at work-- the product of the thinking, "Let's try to breed dogs as small as possible so that they can fit in handbags and loyally accompany their owners hither and yonder." My new canine siblings, named Laverne & Shirley, are "teacups"-- meaning they are literally the size of... a teacup. (See photo.)

This has severe implications:

1. They can get squashed and die if someone would happen to close a door on the poor things, so they have been trained to stop and wait at all doorways until someone comes to pick them up and carry them into the next room.

2. They can't go to the bathroom outside or for walks like those larger, unrefined dogs, because birds might think they are mice and snatch them up for an early breakfast. They instead have to be potty-trained to go on "pee pads" that are set up in the house, kind of like a litter box (but smaller!).

3. My mom combs her hair to go to her meetings, and then combs the dog's hair for its daily outing. Laverne & Shirley can be dressed with little bows in their hair, and like I said before, carried along in a handbag for everyone to gawk at. In Tokyo, I bet I could even find them a distinguished "teacup" sized Burberry sweater and matching hairbow.

Apparently right now, Laverne is the only one home, because Shirley is still being trained not to walk through doorways!

If they make Mom happy (and they seem to), then I'm happy! I'm sure they make the house a bit of a livelier place now that my big mouth and I (and all my friends' big mouths) are gone.

Anyway, I think I know what my Christmas wish this year will be: not to overdo it on the wine and accidentally step on a "teacup"...!